Bayonetta: The best thing since instant noodles

Everyone knows instant noodles are the shit. Maruchan, or good old Nissin, are fucking classic. Well, until I discovered Bayonetta.

Okay, not really "discovered": I've been playing the thing since January. However, I find that it's such an incredibly rich action title, and just an incredible game in general, that I keep coming back to it regardless of whatever else I'm doing. Food? Fuck it, that means less time for Bayonetta! Work? My boss can blow me. Other games? Why bother? They aren't Bayonetta.

Seriously though, Bayonetta boasts the complex branching combo lists of the Ninja Gaiden games, the ability to free-form and spice up combos with ass-loads of extra moves like Devil May Cry on crack, and a cool finisher system that's something like a mix between God Hands roulettes and reflex-based QTE's. On top of that, the enemies are both challenging and fun to fight (who'da thunk?), and the bosses are so epic they make every other action game boss look like absolute shit. SHIT. Christ, just the first boss (Fortitudo, the two-headed chrome dragon-angel) is so fucking incredible and satisfying to fight the game guarantees a Jizzgasm for fighting it. It says so on the back of the fucking box. (Read: no it doesn't).

Story wise, the game is silly, and rarely gets serious. This isn't a bad thing. I can't begin to tell you how stupid games make themselves look when they present shitty, nonsensical conflicts completely seriously, I.E. Ninja Gaiden. Pull your head out of your ass, please. Bayonetta has a great sense of humor, the voice acting is great, and some of the torture attacks are fucking hilarious.

It's only real flaw is the odd instant-kills the game throws at you, be it during some platforming segments, or during cutscene QTEs. Once you recognize them, they aren't a problem, but knowing doesn't make it any less inconvenient.

Here's a little review of mine, which I published for Examiner.com

Anyway, play this game if you haven't already. PLAY IT. I'm serious.

Metroid: Other M, leaked introduction???

This is the leaked introduction to Metroid: Other M. The 3D render for Mother Brain and the Baby Metroid are what make this trailer badass, which explains why Nintendo keeps taking the fucking thing down from Youtube. No doubt they'll catch on and pull it off here too. Which will suck. But still, enjoy it while you can.

I wish it showed some actual game-play.

... Sigh.

Metroid: Other M, New Cinematic Trailer

Metroid: Other M, New Cinematic Trailer

Not much is known about the title, but the game seems to flesh-out Samus' humanity, and give her some actual personality. Mind-blowing, I know.

On top of that, Tecmo's Team Ninja is co-developing the title with Nintendo. Boob-physics FTW. If this title does well, maybe Nintendo will enlist another developer to help make Zelda less stagnant.

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Just Cause 2, pretty badass trailer

What's cool is actually the way the video plays out. You play as Nico, the super-secret ace in the Agency's sleeve, who tackles the military regime in Panau in pursuit of his former boss and mentor Tom Sheldon. It seems going rogue with military intel and cash is not something the Agency takes too lightly.

So you can actually branch out and "play" through different scenarios by clicking on different prompts when you reach a certain part of the video. Kinda like a "choose your own story" book. Neat.

Here comes the New Year...

After neglecting my poor blog for well over a month -a shit-storm of everything bad that shouldn't have happened did happen- I have finally settled everything out (more or less) and can devote myself to my thoughts and writing.

I managed to write a few articles for Multiplayergames.com, submit a few trailers for Examiner.com, and worked on (but never got around to submitting) four articles on misogyny, sexual orientation, and women in videogames (particularly MMOs). I'll get on those ASAP this January.

The coming year is bringing lots of new games to try out as well; games like Bayonetta, Darksiders, Fragile, Final Fantasy XIII, No More Heroes II, Arc Rise Fantasia, and ass-loads more I can't even begin to try and remember.

In any case, the new year is fast approaching (half an hour more, here in New York City). I always said fuck New Year's Revolutions (and I still do), so my promise to myself this coming year is to be honest with myself and tell people how I feel, instead shutting my thoughts up and coddling/ accommodating every needy fuck out there to my own displeasure. I live in New York, after all, nobody here censors themselves like I do, considering how rough and downright nasty people can be in this shit-hole.

I'll need to work on some witty retorts for when the need arises...

Happy New Year, everyone!

Blade & Soul at G-Star 2009 game festival in Busan, South Korea!

All I can say is "Holy Shit". It looks like a must-own MMORPG.

I did a little blurb on Blade & Soul a few months back, (here), when it caught my attention with a beautiful video trailer of the world, the premise of the game (Asian myth and martial-arts), and the freaking fantastic artwork by manhwa artist Hyung-Tae Kim. (Blade & Soul is the only game with Hyung-Tae Kim as it's character illustrator where the characters actually look like their illustrations).

I was very much impressed.

At the G-Star game event in Busan, South Korea, NCsoft revealed two major trailers, one which you can see on Examiner.com, and another which was shown in a press conference, which is pretty shitty quality as it looks like it was filmed on a cell-phone.

Nonetheless, the viewable trailer (again, click here to see it, but be sure to come back) shows us four races total, the Jin and Gon, as well as the slender, graceful new Kun race, and the tiny fox-kids, the Lyn.

In addition, four playable classes were announced, the Sword Masters and Kung-Fu Masters (which we already knew about) plus the new Force Masters (gravity and energy type mages) and Destroyers, the massive axe wielding tanks of the game.

Man, the game looks too fucking awesome to pass up. I can't wait for actual gameplay videos to hit Youtube when the game hits open beta.